The Third Life of Bell-Bottoms

One of the themes going through our lives is revisiting the past.

The past can come around in different forms, including: memories or flashbacks; someone from your past popping back into your life; and trends, to name a few.

And what about remakes? Music, movies, etc.

There are also more negative and larger scale forms like war, genocide and holocausts.


Years ago, I was driving my youngest to her horse lessons. The drive took thirty minutes. We had an agreement to split radio time since our tastes were so different.

Her music consisted of a lot of yelling and/or aggressive music.

Mine? Classic rock, of course.

On one trip – with her radio time – a song came on that I began to sing along with.

My daughter turned the music down and asked, with disbelief, “How do you know this song?”

I explained that I grew up with this song. This version had more aggressive music, but the words remained the same. “R-E-S-P-E-C-T”, Respect from Aretha Franklin. And then there were various artist remakes over the years.

The Third Life of Bell-Bottoms in My Life Time

I wasn’t too fond of bell-bottoms, nor elephant (or elephant ear) jeans when they came out in my pre-teen and teen years.

I didn’t care for them when they showed up again some twenty years or so later.

And they are making a comeback again.

I didn’t want them then, and refuse them now.

The Past Will Come Around Again

All of life has cycles – and it has cycles within cycles.

There are cycles within your own personal daily life. And there are cycles within your town, city, state, country.

The past will come around again – in whatever form – for each of us to make a choice. We have to decide things like:

  • Do we want to partake?
  • Do we want it to be part of our reality / in our life today?
  • Are we going to tolerate it coming/happening again?
  • Or, are we done with it?

What cycle is being brought to your attention, and what will you decide/choose?

Oh, and not making a decision means it will come back again.

I am, however, thankful that the 80’s hairstyles haven’t come back.

by Jan Toomer


Book Review – On Pluto: Inside the Mind of Alzheimer’s by Greg O’Brien

On Pluto: Inside the Mind of Alzheimer’s by Greg O’Brien. 2014, Codfish Press. ISBN 978-0-9913401-0-1.

The author and journalist, Greg O’Brien, offers the reader some in-depth snapshots of his mother’s decline – due to the progressive disease called Alzheimer’s. The same disease had also claimed his maternal grandfather.

O’Brien writes of the effects Alzheimer’s had on not only his mother, but on the family was well — where fear, denial and anguish made repeated appearances.

He shares the stages: early, moderate and advanced – and what presents in each stage. He also provides some startling statistics.

“Pluto” is what Greg coins for the disconnect – like drifting or blank stares. The faraway place that people with Alzheimer’s disappear into with more frequency as their affliction takes more and more from them.

On Pluto: Inside the Mind of Alzheimer’s is a unique book. Not only does the author share some of his interactions with, and observations of, his mother’s experiences – he shares his own…with a rare and welcome raw honesty.

In 2009, at age 59, this investigative reporter, writer and publisher was diagnosed with Early onset Alzheimer’s.

Greg O’Brien weaves a tapestry, leaving the reader with a mental visual of his past, present and possible upcoming future; giving an insider view of the struggles, fear, rage, gratitude, grace and humor about his personal journey with Alzheimer’s. And sharing his story to let others know that they are not alone.

Favorite Passages:

“It is vital for those with Alzheimer’s to connect with the past, the long-term memories and relationships.” p. 137

“…our mother was slowly sliding off the face of the Earth, pulled into the metaphorical orbits of Pluto and Sedna.” p. 142

“I’ve begun labeling the toothpaste, liquid soap, and rubbing alcohol. I have attempted often to brush my teeth with liquid soap, and on two occasions gargled briefly with rubbing alcohol. Scope is far better!” p. 72

Personal Notes:

Though this is not my normal genre of book reviews, I was drawn to read this – and am very glad I did.

Alzheimer’s has touched so many people – directly or peripherally.

There is currently no cure.

This is a call of action to help support research to find a cure.


This book is an introduction to understanding, caring for, living with, or having Alzheimer’s. I believe it would also be helpful to those with other forms of dementia, or those wishing to understand a bit more about dementia.

I thank you, Greg O’Brien, for sharing something painful and personal — to raise awareness, and so that we, the public, can understand a bit better.

Review by Jan Toomer

*A copy of the book was received in return for an honest review.

Your Meta Questions – January 2016

I’ve had a lot of people asking me about Muslims and them “wanting to kill Americans”. I took a portion of one of those emails and will share here (and will be addressing some aspects of other emails as well). Please remember, I am sharing my beliefs, understandings and interpretations.

Q. What is going on in the metaphysical plane with these Muslim souls here on earth, wanting only to kill? Do you have any idea why this is all happening – what is the purpose, the outcome? I cannot comprehend the hatred and evil being put forth. Can you ask your guides for some guidance/reasons? I’m sure other sensitives also feel the negatives which are streaming out.

A. This is definitely a multi-layered and public-sensitive topic. I will address some of the layers.

First – The history of the U.S. (for example – it is the same with other countries as well), and politics is such that we’re supposed to have someone to fear and hate. Seriously. It supposedly drives our economy (and greed) and the government. It is in the government’s interest that we hate/fear someone other than our own country.

Stupid, and has been worked this way for hundreds of years. One of the other reasons is because having a foreign “foe” supposedly unites the country.

For the U.S., some of the past “foes” included Britain (while struggling to become the U.S.), Native Americans, Japan, Germany, Russia, China, as well as various South American governments and the people of the Middle East and Eastern countries. Right now it seems to be the labels “Muslims” and “Syrians”.

Yes, there are some fanatics in just about every facet of human life. But it is grossly incorrect (though encouraged by fear mongering) to think or believe that any skin color/race, religious belief/creed system, country, ethnicity, etc. is all bad, mean, dangerous, and/or wants to kill everyone outside of it’s beliefs.

Second – Negativity is being generated, populated, disseminated — and unfortunately assimilated — in an energetic attempt to keep humans invested in fear. By doing so, we humans allow ourselves to be tied to the third dimension.

The third dimension is all about duality. True/false; light/dark; pain/pleasure; fear/love, etc.

We have “villains” we chose in our “play” (life) for us to learn and grow from; to overcome adversity and learn to bring in light. These are choices made for third dimension experiences.

While we maintain any attachment or anchors to duality, we will be presented with many learning opportunities until we have released our third dimension tethers.

And fear (of anything) is a hefty anchor/tether.

Third – We each have individual choices, on a daily basis, to make in our life.

We each are also part of our own country, state, city, town, neighborhood – and have choices to make with those as well.

When you neglect to make a choice or decision, you are not only allowing the negative behavior or energy to continue, but you allow yourself to be led by a noise-ring.

I am not saying get destructive (fear based). Constructive (positive/love based) decisions and actions are what’s called for here.

The proposed purpose of all of this is:

Physically – politics, fear mongering, mass control, and/or “unity”.

Energetically and spiritually – to grow up (energetically and spiritually). The opportunity to say “no more” to fear, duality, hate, war, etc.

Also, each individual must decide to stay with fear, confusion, anger, hatred…or to rise above it.

We have a choice. We have always had a choice.

What decision will you make?


What is the Outcome?

It is whatever you make it to be. What you allow and won’t allow.



Your thoughts/beliefs on, for example, “rise above it”, may be totally different from mine, and that’s perfectly fine. What works for me, may not work for you.

Here are some of the ways I handle any opportunities to not allow fear into my life.

– I ask myself questions, one of which may be “What am I afraid of?”

At this point, my ego self is quick to point out any negative “worst-case” scenarios it can come up with. Argh…ego is such a drama-queen!

I refuse to invite in, dwell, or create fear to overtake me. I had visualized releasing it, transformed it into pink like, and watched it drift off. Then I visualized filling myself with white light.

– Allowing others their right to their experiences, fear, etc. without accepting it into myself.

Shielding may aid with this.

A childhood saying – for you to recite and visualize in your mind:

“I am rubber – You are glue. Whatever you say (believe) bounces off of me and sticks to you.”

You are not denying anyone their beliefs or fears, but neither are you allowing what doesn’t fit you to be accepted into you/your energy. You can simply return their belief to them.

Simple, but can be effective.

– Reaffirming to self “Only that which is highest and holiest may enter within my being or reality.”

Someone once asked, “Isn’t that just putting on blinders or denying what is going on around you?”

I don’t believe so. I don’t deny what is going on around me, I just don’t wish to live in that kind of energy.

We are creators and have the right to state/say that we do not allow that kind of energy around us.

I am not taking away anyone else’s rights or desires to allow anger, hate, fear, or drama into their lives – I’m just not allowing it into mine.

I think I have only barely touched upon this question, but hopefully have provided enough for you to take another look at your fears, re-address it, and change the energy you have concerning it. And then perhaps apply it to other areas that fear may have a hold in your life.

Remember, if the emotion is not of love, it is fear.

by Jan Toomer


The Power of Words

We’ve talked about accepting responsibility for one’s own thoughts, actions and deeds.

We’ve discussed that each individual’s intent creates each individual’s reality.

But what about words?

We’ve addressed being clear and concise in our written and verbal communication, so we’ve got it all covered, right?


Many are not aware of the power of words they speak to others.


A sniper is someone who verbally attacks another behind the guise, or pretense, of humor.

Then there are those who give back-handed compliments – which really aren’t compliments.

And what about a heckler? Sarcasm, snide remarks, and/or insults thrown out – usually from the back of a room so that (s)he can be difficult to spot…in other words, they hide.

And what of the person who screams, curses and/or threatens another? A verbal bully.

Unfortunately, I see this quite a bit. Some are well aware of what they are doing, while some may not be consciously aware of what they are doing.

Perhaps, like bullies, they don’t feel good about themselves, so they work to tear others down.

After having said all of that, it is no excuse for their behavior. We are each still held responsible for our words – spoken and written.

Words are backed – energetically – with intent.

Words can uplift and/or heal.

Words can also harm – oftentimes leaving wounds invisible to the naked eye. But make no mistake, those wounds can be seen energetically.

Please listen to what words come out of your mouth. Use your power in a constructive manner.

by Jan Toomer


Guides Available to Us

Something occurred last night that is a rarity for me. I had nightmares. Not just one. I’d get out of one only to find myself in a different one.

I was aware that my body was resting and that I was having nightmares. Even with this awareness, the nightmares continued. But, more on this later.

Various Guides Available to Us

Most view guides as someone on the other side who aids us on our Earth journey. It can be guardian angels, angels, guides (aka team or team members), loved ones, etc.

But it can also be a human, who is still living, who can act as a guide. It can be someone you consciously know, or not.


Though in the past this was not commonly discussed, a person bi-locating can be seen, and physically interact, at two places at the same time. One place could be work or home (somewhere where the person can be on auto-pilot); the second place would be with someone in distress. And yes, it can and does happen…it’s not just a legend or myth.

Passing Through or the Inadvertent Guide

We each can be a physical guide to another physical person, whether we know them or not, even if it’s inadvertent and/or only in passing.

A brief conversation in the store while you are perusing the items on the shelves.

A stranger walks up and beings talking about their troubles. Then they may get embarrassed, apologize and hurry away. You usually don’t have to verbally say anything to them, or say very little.

In that brief exchange – while you are mentally scratching your head, trying to figure out why that person was venting their woes at you – please realize that your higher self was more than likely aiding them during their venting.

An inadvertent guide could be someone at the right place at the right time to aid you – or you to aid them.

What you are doing on a spiritual level could be as simple as your higher self works to adjust their energy. You may never know for sure, but your higher self does help others.

A warm smile, kind word, or a kind gesture can change – or even save – a life.


Lucid dreamers are sometimes referred to as Dreamwalkers. Lucid dreamers are aware they are dreaming, and oftentimes can manipulate the dream.

Dreamwalkers can enter other people’s dream and aid or assist them. Dreamwalkers are not always aware of being in another person’s dream, but the dreamer is usually aware of them being there.

How Does Any of Type of Guide Know When to Show Up?

Whether the guide – in any form – remembers what they assisted with or not, it began with a call.

Any person in distress – in dream or awake – has the right to ask for help. When they do this, a call goes out.

A person or being who resonates with that call (one who has the abilities needed and hears the call) will respond.

Not All Dreams are the Same

Some dreams are not the subconscious working things out. Some dreams are really astral, or out-of-body experiences that are being represented as dreams to the conscious mind. This is the mind’s way of trying to make third dimensional sense of the experience, and present it to the conscious mind in an acceptable third dimensional way.

In other words, they are out of body work or experiences.

It’s Not Always About the Dreams

Okay, back to the nightmares.

I had three people – friends – pop in to aid me last night. Each friend helped bring an end to a nightmare.

The first one came — in the first nightmare – as a soothing, calming energy; a gentle breeze that swept around me, taking chaos and leaving peace, nurturing, and calm Mother Earth energy.

The second nightmare brought another person. This one was tall and strong; letting me know she was there to help me kick butt if needed – and laugh and have fun while we’re doing it.

The third was a person, I believe, I hadn’t seen in well over a year. A no nonsense energy with gentle support.

I know the nightmares themselves were not the experience message (though they were purging some really old stuck energies).

This experience excited me because I got to see some friends in their Dreamwalker state, and was happy they aided me. This was a treat, and a blessing, for me.

Thank you all for that.

In Closing

Remember that we can have a human as a guide to help us in our awake or dream experiences.

And that means you can be a guide and/or Dreamwalker for another in need.

by Jan Toomer




Reality Undefined Newsletters – 2016

A mixed bag of metaphysical, spiritual and of-interest articles. Perhaps also some poetry, prose and events. Oh, and a few photos thrown in the mix! These newsletters contain more than what is posted on the blog – Hope you enjoy!

January 2016

February 2016




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