Do Metaphysicians Grieve?
I was speaking with a friend Tuesday – this was the first time I had spoken with her since the death of my daughter, JoAnna. I had just finished going through boxes of JoAnna’s belongings which she had stored at our house, so I was a bit tender from doing that.
During our conversation, my friend asked me a valid question which I will share some of here. (I am paraphrasing, as well as going into a more lengthy answer here.)
She asked about a metaphysical-oriented person (such as myself) and how the loss of a loved one (aka grief) hit us. In essence, because I can talk with those on the other side, and am a human, how did grief hit me?
I related to her about how JoAnna and I had been in contact up until the day before the wake her friends held for her (scheduled May 3rd - 13 days after her death) – and that I would cry every time I felt her presence near me or when she talked to me.
On May 1st, I sat down and told JoAnna that she needed to go back into the Light for a while – it was still too painful for me. I then told her that after I had time to heal, she was welcome to come back.
She gently pulled her energy from me.
On May 2nd, JoAnna popped back in. Smiling, she bowed to me, giggled and said, “Watch!”
In typical mischievous JoAnna-style, she put on a mini-theatrical production for me.
She showed the Light coming down; her friends from the other side appearing from within the Light.
A guardian Angel appeared beside JoAnna, and both – light-heartedly – walked towards the Light. JoAnna kept looking back at me, smiling.
She entered the Light – high-fiving her friends – and then turned back to me. The guardian Angel had moved beside JoAnna. Opened double doors appeared; the guardian Angel pulled one door closed and JoAnna began pulling her door closed.
As JoAnna’s door was almost closed, she swung it open a little wider, stuck out her hand and energetically waved; she bowed, and shut the door.
I laughed.
Her message was, “See? I’m giving you closure!”
- – - – - -
I have cried, and tears still spontaneously spring forth – even as I write this.
I am a physical being. I mourn the physical loss of my daughter, who was also my friend. I miss her physical presence.
Yes, metaphysicians grieve.
I do want each of you to know that even if you can’t hear or sense your deceased loved ones yet – they can, and do, hear you.
Your prayers for your loved ones are heard and appreciated by them – as is when you talk to them.
And please know that when you are going “Home”, they will be there to greet you.
In Love and Light, Jan.
May 27, 2009
What a beautiful story, Jan. That you were there to share JoAnna’s transformation is so poignant and bittersweet. A wonderful gift on the one hand, but, as you say, you are a physical being. We can’t help that part of ourselves, and to do so would deny one of the most beautiful elements of our nature that makes us who we are.
Brava, and warm hugs.
JoAnna came here as a very special gift to you. Her purpose on this earth was to teach you unconditional love. Her presence here was selfless. Her true desire and love was to be home, where she is now. The drugs, rebellious nature was justified because she would not conform to the darkness of this world. She completed her mission long before she left, but her plan was altered, as she too fell in love with you, and that allowed her to grow also. When the time came where she was of age to cut the apron stings, it was time for her to go.
Of course you are going to grieve, otherwise, she would not have completed her mission.
Unconditional love is what it’s all about. How you exit, the things you have to go through, the contrast, is only there as a tool to align you with who you are. It’s all drama, nothing more.
Thank you Karen.
Thank you Liz.
JoAnna was a special person (but I am very biased on this subject), and am grateful for the time I had with her.
Jan, I am so sorry your daughter left early. But how lucky you are to be aware of her visits. The majority of us hope they are around us and hear how much we still miss and love them. But you have absolute certainty and experience it fully. Thank you for the reminder and the reassurance that they *do* hear us. It means a lot, I can never hear it too much..big thank you for sharing.
Thank you Max. And am pleased if it reassures anyone.
Hi Jan, Thank you for sharing your experience. You are absolutely right – even Jesus grieved. But as he we should overcome our grieve by knowing that in reality our loved ones are not dead but live and as the remote stars we are not able to see them by our material senses. And though we mis their words and physical presence their thoughts and good deeds are always with us.
WIth much love,
Michael.
Thank you Michael for your kind words. And yes, I agree with you.
Beautiful story. I think that your friend asked a funny question, though. Why wouldn’t you grieve? You are human and having a physical experience. Separation from a loved one is a very real part of this experience and the feelings mirror the larger one of being separated from our source; whether one calls the source God, oneness, etc.
Thanks for sharing this story.
That’s my thinking, anyway
Hey beautiful Jan, what an amazing story. You have my (energetic) hugs – felt it?
Woo, I definitely felt you. You’re still aching – right? Clean but still raw and open. One year after writing this – well she is your child! How terrible to lose your child before her time! I’m self conscious about my psychic ability but I think I’m feeling you right.. I still have ya in my heart chakra 
Have lots of energy, there’s more where that came from. Love you 
It’s funny I found this because just today I noticed an old blog post of mine about a friend who died (www.andrewgubb.com/drupal/aris) and I was writing about the same thing. I knew she was still alive on another plane, but it hurt anyway. Why does it hurt so much? I think it’s a bit of a mystery in a way, but I don’t want to deny a single part of the beauty of being human
It was funny when I expressed my grief so openly with the large group of people I was staying with (mostly non-metaphysicians *gasp* SO MANY SYLLABLES)… most of them were VERY uncomfortable with the idea of death. I noticed most of them kind of shifting in their seats. They don’t like to be reminded about their fear that one day they might just stop existing. So maybe I experience grief differently by being unabashed about it!
Hope you’re doing OK darling.
Love
Andrew
Hi Andrew –
Yes, my friend, I am doing fine. In a way, writing and talking about her death – and death in general – has helped my hubby (Jeff) and I. I think of her daily, and talk to her often (she pops in now and again).
And yes, many do squirm in their seats when talking about death; and I do realize that we each handle death our own unique way – so there is nothing wrong with your handling it unabashedly!
*Hugs* to you – and Thank You Andrew!