Q. Why don’t you write many Energy Updates anymore?

A. There are a lot of other sources that provide the update. If the energy is intense, I will share someone else’s post on that energy update (on Reality Undefined’s FB page). If I do not come across someone else’s post  that is informative about the energies coming through and what we (generalized) are experiencing, then I will put out another Energy Update.

Q. My mom died last year, and I really miss her. How can I see her or communicate with her?

A. I am sorry for your loss. Even though I believe no one is truly “gone” – they just no longer wear the body suit we had come to know – we certainly can grieve the loss of their physical presence.

First, I do highly recommend grief counseling or grief group to help you with your grief.

Second, when our grief is overwhelming, our deceased loved ones have trouble getting through to us.

When our deceased loved one’s physical body dies, and the loved one crosses over, they do not always try to pop in to say “Hi!”, or “I am okay”, etc. They have their own counseling to receive, a life review, education/training to go through and so on.

Also, if it is (a) against your soul plan; (b) unhealthy for you (example: you are not dealing with your own life, escapism, not dealing with your grief, etc.); (c) other reasons that may not be divulged to us…then they will not visit.

Having said that, please be assured that the reason(s) they don’t visit/make their presence known is not because of lack of love…ever! I don’t care what kind of relationship you had on Earth. Once we go “Into the Light”, we leave all earthly pettiness and crap behind. Period. The love they have for you when they cross over is stronger than you can even imagine.

When the grieving process had been allowed (counseling if one gets stuck), and the deceased loved one is allowed (as per your own soul plan/soul path), they can visit you in dreams.

Another way is they can send a gentle reminder of their presence. This can come in the form of:

  • a song on the radio
  • pennies or coins
  • a specific animal crosses your path (specific bird, butterfly, ladybug, Corgi, etc.) that means something special to you – or one that may have connection between you and the deceased loved one

Here are some examples of how my deceased loved ones pop in to say “Hi!” to me:

  • my father plays a song from the Carpenter’s on my satellite radio.
  • my grandfather came with the spontaneous smell of cigars (until I asked him to stop that – the smell turns my stomach. He began coming with the smell of Old Spice aftershave and all was good).
  • my mother brings the a faint smell of cigarette smoke. my grandmother will gift me with the gentle scent of roses.
  • one dog nudges my hand (like she did when she was alive).
  • two other dogs make the click-clack sound on their nails on the wood floor.

Q. I want to communicate with my mom, but haven’t found a medium that has been able to do this. Why not?

A. Mediums and spiritual messengers (channelers) would love to help you communicate with your mom, but it isn’t like going to restaurant, ordering something specific and it arrives.

Another way to look at it is — just because we have the “phone” and the “phone number” doesn’t mean someone is there to take our call.

Those who have crossed over have their own stuff going on. Though mom can be requested, we can only be the messenger for those who come forward for us to hear/see. (Also, take note of the previous question – some of those may apply as to why mom hasn’t stepped forward.)

Now, if someone tells you that they guarantee they can connect with your mom, please run away.

Q. You are able to communicate with those on the other side. Do you have to prepare before you meet with the client? Do you have any physical sensations?

A. After a client schedules an appointment with me, their team might open up communication with me anytime before the actual appointment. I usually write this down as it comes. By the client setting an appointment, it is giving their team the go ahead to communicate with me.

The team may bring forward some information, which can be a message (or messages) they want to give the client. Sometimes the information they provide are answers to some of the questions the client intends to ask at their appointment.

On the day of the appointment is when it can get really busy for me (but not always). There is a lot of activity, and usually more communication with me for the client.

This is when I may begin experiencing physical sensations. I may begin sweating (or in the south we said, “Glistening. Women don’t sweat.”), my heart speeds up a bit, the communication becomes a bit louder and I feel the team’s presence more strongly in the area with me. Though it may sound uncomfortable, it isn’t.

About 30-45 minutes prior to the clients appointment, the energy builds up so much that I get antsy. I cannot sit still or concentrate.

If the client is anywhere from 5-15 minutes out from the appointment time, things get very still.

If you’ve ever experienced “the calm before the storm”, you know how eerily quiet it gets. I also liken this to the eye of the storm of a hurricane or tropical storm. It stays that eerie quiet until the roar of the other side of the storm comes through.

When the appointment time arrives, a milder form of “antsyness” comes in. Their team usually wants to jump right into and begin communicating (begin the session).

Because of the intense energy, I usually only see one client, or do one case, a day.

Further Reading/Possible Interest:

E-book (pdf) – Life Before, During and After Being a Human — $4.00

Do Metaphysicians Grieve? (article, free)

Articles on After Death / Dying (free)

by Jan Toomer


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